Day 27 (02/21/15): I don't want anyone to get the wrong impression. So, today's post is a reminder that it is easier to talk than it is to walk.
Don't get me wrong. The last 26 or so days have been a huge learning experience for me. I have loved (almost) every minute of it and I have grown and learned SO much. I have learned that I can let go of my control issues and I can indeed trust God with my life.
...and yet. In all the learning, I am still failing at times. Sure, there is the more obvious way of simply forgetting to give God control in a given situation. To come up to a problem and start by figuring out how to fix it instead of asking God for wisdom, praising him through the trial, or giving thanks to him in all things. God has definitely helped me get better in that area.
Nope, the real issue that I was facing the other day is continuing to trust God even when I have given him control. Example: I have remembered to pray and ask God to be in control of something. The baby crying at 4 AM, my attitude, etc. Now, we know that God is not a genie in a bottle. We can't just say, "God, I'm giving you control so this is what I'd like to have happen." No, we give control and allow him to work. But...that means sometimes the baby is going to keep crying and sometimes it's going to be a rough night. Sometimes I'm going to lose my patience, or worse, my temper. So, if I allow myself to get down or depressed in those moments, I'm...well, I'm being human. But that isn't really an excuse. Because my actions are saying, "God I'm not 100% sure that you are doing what's best for me." I'm doubting God's love for me and his ability to do what is best for me.
So, I'm still failing guys. I am, however, also realizing the problem and praying for God's grace and help to allow me to build better habits and more trust in my God and savior.
"God, help us to be exercising our trust muscles so that we can be more quickly and more completely trusting you both in the easy moments and when things are just plain hard."
Don't get me wrong. The last 26 or so days have been a huge learning experience for me. I have loved (almost) every minute of it and I have grown and learned SO much. I have learned that I can let go of my control issues and I can indeed trust God with my life.
...and yet. In all the learning, I am still failing at times. Sure, there is the more obvious way of simply forgetting to give God control in a given situation. To come up to a problem and start by figuring out how to fix it instead of asking God for wisdom, praising him through the trial, or giving thanks to him in all things. God has definitely helped me get better in that area.
Nope, the real issue that I was facing the other day is continuing to trust God even when I have given him control. Example: I have remembered to pray and ask God to be in control of something. The baby crying at 4 AM, my attitude, etc. Now, we know that God is not a genie in a bottle. We can't just say, "God, I'm giving you control so this is what I'd like to have happen." No, we give control and allow him to work. But...that means sometimes the baby is going to keep crying and sometimes it's going to be a rough night. Sometimes I'm going to lose my patience, or worse, my temper. So, if I allow myself to get down or depressed in those moments, I'm...well, I'm being human. But that isn't really an excuse. Because my actions are saying, "God I'm not 100% sure that you are doing what's best for me." I'm doubting God's love for me and his ability to do what is best for me.
So, I'm still failing guys. I am, however, also realizing the problem and praying for God's grace and help to allow me to build better habits and more trust in my God and savior.
"God, help us to be exercising our trust muscles so that we can be more quickly and more completely trusting you both in the easy moments and when things are just plain hard."
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