When your "thorn in the flesh" is removed...

I have spent 6 years with chronic itching 24/7/365 (unless I take medicine to suppress it and it took a while before we figured that out). The last 1.5 or so has added an upset stomach more days than not. I have been to allergists, dermatologists, and others. I have had plenty of tests and "trial and error" guesses as well. I have fasted and prayed asking God to remove it or help me to know where it was coming from so that we could help mitigate the symptoms.

Several months ago, based on a test we had taken, we decided to cut back on my dairy to see if that would help any of this. Well, it didn't affect the itching, but my stomach seemed to settle down. In fact, I had a few times where I had something dairy, didn't realize it, and ended up really sick.

However, in the last month I have come back to the memory of the fact that I have had reactions to stainless steel in the past. So I called my doctor, got in with a dermatologist, had a patch test done (they cover about 1/4 of your back with things you might be allergic too and cover that with tape....that you can't take off for 2 days), and it turns out I am severely allergic to nickel. OK. So, what does that mean? Well, stainless steel and white gold are alloyed with Nickel to give them strength. My multi-vitamin for years has had nickel. Cocoa (chocolate), wheat, nuts, and soy are all high in nickel. Oh, and things that are in a tin can will have nickel leeched into the food... The bright side to that is that I had a false-positive to dairy as I was cutting things like chocolate (thinking it was the milk, but it was the nickel) and feeling better. I have had a TON of dairy this weekend and been fine now that I'm working to avoid nickel.

Have you ever been in a place where you prayed Paul's "thorn in the flesh" prayer? A "God, please take this from me" prayer? Maybe somehow hoping that God will choose to do with you what He wouldn't do with Paul and take away whatever "thorn in the flesh" you are praying about.

Sometimes He does and sometimes he doesn't. Just remember why He told Paul that He wouldn't take it away? It was because "My grace is sufficient for you. My strength is completed in your weakness." So, would it have been good for Paul for it to be removed? No. Is it always good for us when it is? No. Sometimes that thing is something we need to keep us leaning on and dependent on God. A way for us to be a testimony to those around us.

Think about it. I am a control-freak at heart. I wrestle with that daily and yet, now, we may very well be removing one more thing that drove me to be dependent on God. We may be giving me more room to be independent and do things on my own. Is that really such a good thing? Don't get me wrong, I'm giddy excited to have a possible answer to a 6-year frustration...I'm just also cautious and trying to remember how much I need God and not allow this to be something that allows me to push away even more than I already do.

So, if your "thorn in the flesh" has or hasn't been removed, just remember that God is the one in control and either one can allow you to grow your relationship with God. Just don't allow the joy of a thorn removed to keep you from Him!

To God be the glory!

"Love vs. apathy" or "Do I even love God??"

I made the argument a few posts ago that the opposite of love was not hate, but rather apathy.

First, let's define our terms so that we are very clear about what we are talking about. Thanks to the Cambridge dictionary, I have an American English definition and a British English definition.
American English: lack of interest, or the attitude of not caring resulting from it.
British English: behavior that shows no interest or energy and shows that someone is unwilling to take action, especially over something important.

OK. That's apathy. Let's look at the definition of love as I'm thinking about it for this post. Please note, there are no warm fuzzy feelings and there are no emotions in what I'm doing here.

I Corinthians 13:4-8a (paraphrased): Love is patient and kind. Love is not discontent or resentful because of what someone else has. Love does not brag, is not arrogant, is not rude, does not demand its own way, and is not irritable. Love is not happy when bad things happen to people and rejoices in the truth. Loves bears, believes, hopes, and endures all things. Love never ends.

Look!! It's all verbs. It's action. Yes some things (irritability) might be driven by emotion, but it's the action that is being talked about. Love is a verb and it describes action whereas apathy is the exact opposite of that as it describes an inaction.

Summary:
1. Love cares what happens to another person. Love tells my child not to play in the street. Apathy doesn't care. Apathy says, "I don't care whether you play in the street or not."
2. Love is an action and apathy is inaction.

So, do we act toward God with love or are we inactive? Do we respond to the Holy Spirit guiding us or do we sit back and ignore Him? Do we respond with action based on what we read about God in the Bible? Does our prayer time get us up and moving? Or do we sit back to see what will happen without us?

Now, this post is me talking to Christians. Because 1) I don't believe that doing good things plays a role in salvation and 2) why should you act loving towards a God you don't believe in. So, it is the Christian to whom I say, if you truly believe that God is who the Bible says He is, and you accept His gift of salvation and say that you love Him, then what actions are corresponding to that love? If there is no action, then there is no love!

I wish I had this down myself. I wish I could say that I was an example to follow, but I'm not. I'm just as guilty of an apathetic spiritual life as many others I see today. I talk a religious talk, but do I pray (meaningfully, not just for meals and when I'm stuck in traffic) and do I read God's Word on a daily basis because those are the main actions I can perform to get to know this God that I love? Or do I go through the day trying to make myself happy? Sometimes I remember to thank God for the good days. In fact, many days I do. I try hard not to be an ungrateful person. But, if my love is nothing more than gratefulness, and there is no other action that goes with it...then that's a really weak love.

So, let's just talk about today. What are you going to do today to reciprocate God's love for you? Will it be to reach out to the needy or to a fellow Christian who needs encouragement (obeying God's commands), will you spend some good, quality time alone with God today (growing the loving relationship you have with God), or will you share the love of God with someone you know (fulfilling the great commission)? All action and all love!


To God be the glory!